I Ordered The Cheeseburger, Not The Cheesebooger

You know how I feel about permissive parents who let their children run amuk...

But sheesh, can't a person eat a meal without having to grind their teeth so as to maintain a polite, but defensive, visage while impolite persons let their 8 year old offspring lean over the shared booth back & pick their noses, threatening you with "flicks" of it on your food? Added joy when you must also listen to their 10 year old "baby girl" scream that her meal isn't coming quickly enough.

Why do parents sit stoically by & do nothing to correct their child's behavior? They see it, but they do nothing -- save for, perhaps, talk loudly on their own cell phones about how annoying & inappropriate their child is, rhetorically adding, "But whatcha gonna do?"

I'll tell you what you can do: Parent your child.

I'm seriously thinking about getting a copy of The Restaurant Rescue Kit & Guide in preparation for my next meal out...

Maybe a big stack of them; then I can write & attach notes that read as follows:

Excuse me, but I could not help but notice -- no matter how desperately I tried! -- that you have neither any control over your child nor the desire to even try to teach them how to behave in public.

I can only conclude that your child is the product of permissive parenting & that despite your continued compliance with your offspring's demanding cries of "Entertain me at all times!" you have failed to foresee your child's need to be quietly entertained here and have provided nothing, not even simple conversation, with which to help your child pass the time... Or maybe you just don't give a damn that you & your family are rudely intruding upon the rest of us here.

In any case, please use this book to keep your child busy & entertained in a quiet manner.

No need to thank me; the ability to enjoy my meal is thanks enough.

I'll need a really big stack of these books because once the parent reads the note, I'm sure they'll be so angry at my "audacity" that they won't be polite and return the book when they (or my family & I) are done with their meal.

Or maybe they or their bratty kid will throw the book at me and I'll get the copy back.

In any case, my point will clearly have been made; but I bet you a hundred bucks, not one of these parents will feel compelled to actually properly parent.